An Integrated Life

The Blessing of Mindfulness

I’m realizing how grateful I am for mindfulness. I can remember those times of stress when I simply could not meditate. I still labored under the notion that I had to have my mind still or it wasn’t “meditation.” But in addition, I would be so restless I couldn’t sit still for more than a few minutes unless I was reading. But I never quite gave up (though I often felt like a failure). I kept trying to just pay attention, not just to my breath, but to whatever else I was doing, from mowing the lawn to riding the exercise bike. Gradually I extended this awareness to my mental and emotional states as well. (This was trickier, as I really had to let go of more judgment than I ever thought I had!)

Suffering

At our Buddhist group (part of our Unitarian Universalist church) last night we discussed suffering. This was the Buddha's first Noble Truth, that incontrovertible fact of existence that gets our attention. It's actually good news. Just as pain causes us to let go of that hot pan we were going to pick up (I've done this!), suffering is an indication that something we are doing could be done differently. Because the second Truth is that there are actions that lead to suffering, the third Truth is that we don't have to go there, and the final Truth is, of course, the path that alleviates and gets us out of suffering. To be aware of suffering is to have the possibility of finding another way to live.

Integrating Outer With Inner

I’ve come to realize that, important as it is to integrate all the scattered pieces of oneself, it’s every bit as important to integrate that self into the larger reality of which we are all a part. I am currently in an online dialogue group, working to start such a dialogue group locally (as a face-to-face group), and I am helping to get a Buddhist meditation group going in my Unitarian Universalist church.